Three years in business - what I know now
Written by Amy Orsini, Reiki Master Teacher, Sound Practitioner & Life Coach at Three Little Birds, Purley, London.
Three Little Birds is three years old! 🥳
Which feels both completely normal and slightly ridiculous.
On one hand, it feels like I have been doing this forever. Reiki, sound, coaching, writing, teaching, holding space, learning, planning, creating, changing things, changing them again, wondering why my booking system has decided to have a personality of its own.
On the other hand, I can still remember how nervous I felt when I first started.
Before Three Little Birds, I worked in investment banking in the City of London for around 20 years. I had structure, salary, strategy, systems and a clear role. Then, after redundancy and a lot of reflection, I decided to take the money and run.
Not literally (although I do love a good walk).
I knew I wanted to help people. I knew Reiki had helped me. I knew sound and coaching were going to become part of the work too. The thing is, knowing what you want to do and becoming the person who actually does it are not quite the same thing.
That has been one of the biggest lessons of the last three years.
Starting a business is not just about websites, booking systems, marketing, tax, social media and deciding whether you really need another notebook - in case you were wondering, you always need another notebook.
It is about identity.
It is about self-trust.
It is about deciding what you want, then having the courage to keep choosing it, even on the hard days.
It really is all in your head
If I had to sum up what I have learned in one sentence, it would be this:
It’s all in your head.
That might not sound like business advice, but actually, it is.
Of course, there are practical things to learn when you start a business. You need to understand money, systems, your services, your clients, your time, your energy, and how people can actually book and pay you without needing a treasure map.
But underneath all of that is your mindset.
Do you believe this is possible for you?
Do you believe your work has value?
Do you believe you are allowed to be seen doing something different?
Do you believe you can learn what you need to learn?
Do you believe you can keep going when things feel uncertain?
Do you believe you are worthy to be paid for your skills and expertise?
When you work for yourself, there is no manager handing you a strategy and your tasks for the quarter. There is no team deciding the direction. There is no one checking whether you are at your desk at 9am.
Sounds dreamy, doesn't it? (And it is!)
It can also feel a bit like being handed a blank piece of paper and told, “Right then, create your life.”
Amazing. Terrifying. Exciting.
Freedom needs focus
One of the best things about working for yourself is freedom.
You can choose your hours. You can choose what you focus on. You can choose how you work, where you work, and who you work with.
You can also spend two hours researching something that was never on your list because someone mentioned it in passing and now your brain has decided it might be the answer to everything.
This is why focus matters.
When I spoke to GCSE students recently about my work, they were far more interested in what it is like to work for yourself than what it was like to work in investment banking. The thing I kept coming back to was this:
The best thing about working for yourself is that you are free.
The hardest thing about working for yourself is also that you are free.
No one is telling you what to do. That means you get to decide.
But it also means you have to decide.
You have to create your own structure. You have to choose your own priorities. You have to notice when you are being pulled off course by other people’s ideas, your own fear, or the sudden urgent need to reorganise a drawer or paint the lounge.
Decide what you actually want
This sounds obvious, but it is one of those things we often skip.
We say we want to start a business, change direction, feel better, grow, create something new or become more confident.
But what does that actually mean?
When I started Three Little Birds, I had to get clear. I knew I wanted to offer Reiki because I loved it and had seen how much it helped people. I knew I wanted to help people feel calmer, clearer and more connected to themselves.
But I also had to think about the practical side.
What kind of work did I want to do?
Who did I want to work with?
What hours did I want to work?
What kind of life did I want this business to support?
What kind of energy did I want to bring into my work?
This is where journaling can be so helpful. Not because the journal magically builds the business for you, which would be lovely, but because it helps you hear yourself think.
Write down what you want.
Write down what excites you.
Write down what you would love your working life to look like.
It does not all have to be realistic right now. You are not writing a contract with the universe in permanent marker. You are giving yourself a direction.
Direction matters.
Your self-image has to catch up
One of the harder parts of starting my business was not learning the practical things. I expected that.
The harder part was shifting how I saw myself.
For around 20 years, my self-image was tied to working in the City. I was professional. I worked in investment banks. I had a certain kind of role, rhythm and identity.
Then suddenly I was saying, “I’m a Reiki Master Teacher. I’m a sound practitioner. I’m a coach. I run a wellbeing business.”
It was true.
But it was also new.
And new can feel awkward at first.
When you have seen yourself one way for a long time, it can take a while to feel comfortable becoming someone else. Not because the old version was wrong, but because your mind likes familiar things. Even when those familiar things no longer fit.
This is why inner work is not separate from business growth. It is part of it.
The more comfortable you become with who you are now, the easier it is to speak about your work, share your offers, support your clients and make decisions from self-trust rather than fear.
Not every good idea is your good idea
When you start something new, people often want to help.
And they will have ideas.
Lovely ideas. Creative ideas. Interesting ideas. Ideas that might genuinely work for someone.
But that does not mean they are right for you.
Over the last three years, people have suggested all sorts of things to me. Reiki for babies. Sound bowls with dance music. Renting different treatment rooms. Different collaborations. Different directions.
Some of those ideas were genuinely brilliant.
But they were not always my next step.
This is such an important lesson.
You can appreciate someone’s idea without adopting it.
You can listen with an open mind and still stay focused.
You can say, “That’s interesting,” without rebuilding your whole business by lunchtime.
Especially when you work for yourself, your time and energy are precious. If you keep chasing every shiny new idea, you may end up moving further away from the thing you actually wanted.
Focus is not about being rigid.
It is about protecting what matters.
Invest in yourself
One thing I said to the students I spoke to recently was this:
Learning does not stop when you leave education. It just gets better, because you get to choose.
I love that.
When you are an adult, you get to choose what you learn. You can follow your curiosity. You can invest in the skills, support and knowledge that help you grow.
For me, Reiki started as something I was curious about. I wanted to understand energy. I had no idea that one day I would teach Reiki, offer treatments, run sound baths, coach clients and build a whole business around helping people feel calmer, clearer and more connected.
You never know where learning will lead you.
Investing in yourself is not selfish. It is not indulgent. It is not something you only do when everything else is sorted.
It is how you grow.
And if your work involves supporting other people, your growth matters. Your confidence, clarity, knowledge and self-trust all become part of what you bring to your clients.
Choose one thing for this season
One of the most helpful things you can do, in business or in life, is choose one main focus for the season.
Not forever.
Just for now.
When I first started, one of my main goals was becoming a verified Reiki practitioner. That process took time, focus and commitment. It helped me grow professionally and personally. It also helped me support my Reiki students more deeply because I understood the process from the inside.
Having one focus gave me direction.
Direction is calming.
When everything feels possible (and I believe that everything is possible), it can also feel overwhelming. Choosing one focus helps you stop scattering your energy everywhere.
Ask yourself:
What is the one thing that would make the biggest difference right now?
What is the thing I keep saying matters, but not actually giving time to?
What would feel really good to complete, begin or commit to?
Then make that the focus.
Not the only thing you ever do. Just the thing you keep coming back to.
Take action every day
There are no magic shortcuts. I'd love to tell you there were.
There are supportive tools, good advice, coaching, mentoring, books, courses and conversations that can help you move faster or with more clarity.
At some point, you still have to take action or you will get nowhere.
Not huge dramatic action every day.
Small action counts.
Sending the email. Writing the page. Booking the course. Updating the website. Recording the podcast. Making the decision. Asking the question. Practising the skill. Taking the walk. Coming back to the plan.
Confidence often comes after action, not before it.
We wait to feel ready, but readiness is not always the doorway. Action is.
You take the step, and then your confidence catches up.
The real lesson
Three years in business has taught me more than I expected.
It has taught me practical things, of course. Systems. Marketing. Planning. Booking software. Boundaries. Pricing. All the things.
But more than that, it has taught me about becoming.
Becoming more confident.
Becoming more focused.
Becoming more trusting of myself.
Becoming less attached to how I used to see myself.
Becoming more willing to choose what feels aligned, even if it does not make sense to everyone else.
And maybe that is the real work for all of us, whether we run a business or not.
To decide what we want.
To trust ourselves enough to begin.
To keep choosing the next right step.
And to remember that we are allowed to become someone new.
In conclusion
If you are starting something, changing direction or trying to step into a new version of yourself, please know this:
It is normal for it to feel wobbly.
It is normal for your old self-image to hang around for a while.
It is normal to get distracted.
It is normal to need support.
But you are allowed to want what you want. You are allowed to choose your own direction. You are allowed to invest in yourself, focus your energy and take one small step at a time.
You do not have to have the whole thing figured out.
You just need to know the next step.
Whether you run a business, are thinking about starting one, or you’re simply in a season of change and becoming, I hope this feels like a friendly little nudge to trust yourself and take the next step.
If you're curious about Reiki, or reminds you that you’re ready to invest in yourself, my Reiki courses are a beautiful place to begin. Reiki Level 1 is all about learning to support yourself, reconnect with your energy and build a practice you can carry with you every day.
And because it’s me, there’s always a bit of coaching in there too 😉
Have a wonderful day, my friend,
Amy
If you liked this post, you may also enjoy: